And she's done it again...

54 minutes.
126 applauds.
More than 6 billion audience.

And so, she's done it again. President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo has given her "last" (and longest) state of the nation address today at the Batasang Pambansa. And as usual, I watched the whole event on TV just like I always do. Well, I'm not really into politics or anything. I'm not even pro-administration or anti-administration. I just enjoy watching Madame President whenever she gives out her speeches about the country's "development" and what her administration has done to improve our struggling nation. Dunno, ever since I watched her SONA for the first time, I always wanted to finish it. Some people at my age find it boring, I find it..well..entertaining for the most part. I can't help but laugh on some of the things that she says. I don't wanna comment on them anymore, but if you watched her on TV, I think you might actually understand what I mean.

But anyway, even though how much the people hate her, I still find her amazing. Not in a sense that she's a good leader or anything, but because of her unique personality that I find very amazing. Despite of everything, she still has the courage to stand up and look strong in front of her people. Yes, she may be in to a lot of controversies lately, but the president still stays strong and brave to face her people with both love and authority. I may not like her when it comes to governing, but I do admire her personality.

"Governance, however, is not about looking back and getting even
But it is looking forward and giving more to the people
who has given us the hardest and greatest gift of all,
to care for a country.."
-PGMA

(I just hope this really is her LAST state of the nation address! )

Hospital duty: Day 2

My second day in the area was a mixture of excitement and disappointment. I still had the same patient that I had yesterday. Apparently, the woman's husband doesn't have the money yet so they still can't leave the hospital although both the mother and her baby are cleared for discharge. Because I had the same patient as yesterday, it means that I have less jobs to do..and it sucks!! All my other groupmates in the ward are busy doing their physical assessment while I just stand there watching them getting busy. It's not fair, I wanna be busy too. Plus, their cases are better than mine. My case is just the typical postmaternity mother who had a normal spontaneous delivery. She's fine, her baby is fine and their only problem is that they still can't pay their hospital bills. The others got the chance to be assigned to new patients with cooler cases like CS, preterm labor or Dilation&Curettage. One of my classmate regulated the IV fluids and had to check her patient's vital signs EVERY 15 MINUTES. One of us was given the chance to take out a urinary catheter (I wanna do that too!). As for me, I just waited for what seems like eternity! I waited for my patient to be discharged, I waited for a new patient, a new case, a new assignment.

I hate my 2nd day of duty!

Hospital Duty: Day 1

Lipa City District Hospital. 7am-3pm. Dra. Anita Urbi RN, MAN, PhD

I woke up at 4:30 am this morning because I don't wanna be late on my first hospital duty at the Lipa District Hospital. I left home at 5:40 am and arrived at lipa at exactly 6:00am. I still had to wait for the others so that we could all go to LCDH at the same time to meet our Clinical Instructor. We arrived there 30 minutes earlier than the call time which was 6:45. I was early..or so I thought. Many students were already there together with their clinical instructors. I thought we were gonna be the first ones to arrive. Then we realized that we have different times. The hospital time was 30 minutes in advance, meaning, we were not early. We were almost late!!!! What the..??? What kind of place sets its clock 30 minutes in advance??? 5 minutes is okay but 30 minutes is "OA"

The good thing is that we weren't considered as late..plus, it wasn't our fault that we don't know the official hospital time. I just looked at the brighter side of it. The earlier we start, the earlier we finish.

Anyway, I forgot to mention the hospital part. The hospital doesn't look like a hospital at all! It was more like a construction site. I haven't seen the whole vicinity yet (we never had the time to get familiarized with the place) but I'm guessing that 60% of the hospital is under construction. There were hollow blocks and sacks of cement everywhere! Trucks carrying wood and gravel were parked outside the hospital. What a mess!!It was so unruly, not to mention the distracting sounds of the machineries. Not ideal for patients who are trying to recover. But that wasn't the worst part yet..inside the hospital is a different kind of mess. There were so many patients and the hospital can't accomodate them anymore. A lot of patients were already in the hallways! A typical scenario of a public hospital. There wasn't enough space to walk on to. There was poor ventilation so there was a mixed smell of sweat and urine that dominated the place. They didn't have enough hospital facilities so some of the patients in the hallways even had to bring their own beds and improvise their IV poles!! I know it's not polite to react but I really can't help myself! It's my first time so I was really shocked..not that I'm not aware of the condition in public hospitals, it's just that it was my first time to actually see one. What I don't understand is that most of the people working there, specially the nurses, don't seem to care. My partner said that maybe they are just used to that kind of situation..like it's normal to have a lot of patients staying in the hallway.

We didn't do much on our first day. We just attended the very boring orientation until 11 then we we're given a chance to have some nurse-patient interaction in the OB ward. We were only asked to do a physical assessment and initial examination on the patients but I still felt very nervous. We were brought to the ward and instead of assigning a patient to each of us, we were asked to pick our own. I picked the one in Bed F. Her name is Marissa Guab and she just gave birth to a baby boy (who was really cute, btw). She was really nice (thank God!) although the woman with her was kinda annoying. I think she was the girl's mother-in-law or something.

I kinda messed up with the arrangement of my Phys. exam and assessment and the notes I wrote weren't organized enough. But that's okay..the others had worse notes. hehe.. I interviewed the mother and I found out that she was admitted 3 days ago. She just had a normal spontaneous delivery so it means that she should only be confined for 24 hours. She said that she was supposed to be discharged yesterday but because they can't pay their bills yet, they still can't go home even if they wanted to. The longer they stay, the bigger they'll end up paying. She seemed so stressed and problematic but what can I do?? Kahit gaano kadaming beses ko syang kunan ng vital signs, wala akong magagawa sa problema nya..di ba? I wish I could help her get discharged but I felt helpless. I'm just new at this, and it's only my first day in the area. Until now, i still can't get that out of my mind. I felt this odd sympathy for that woman. And I can do nothing except to pray to God to help her get discharged.

This day has been very tiring to me even though I only handled one patient in the OB ward (well, it was actually two patients including the baby). I think I can handle the job, what I can't handle are my feelings. I become too attached to the patients. But that's just me. My mom said that I'll get used to it. I hope so coz it's really difficult if you keep on feeling sorry for all the patients there.

Okay..that's it for now. I still have to do homework.

Wish me luck for tomorrow!

tomorrow is the beginning of "the rest of my life"

wah. This is it. My first official hospital duty begins tomorrow.

Lipa City District Hospital. OB Ward. 6:45 am. With Dr. Anita Urbi RN, MAN, PhD

Is that scary or what??

The thing is, last friday, I was actually very excited at the thought of going on my first hospital duty. I can't wait. I want the weekends to be over (yeah, i know. can't believe i said that)

But now..I'm beginning to get a little bit anxious about tomorrow. No. Scratch that. I'm soo nervous. I don't want to make any mistakes tomorrow. Whether it's taking vital signs, bringing something to the laboratory, or whatever it is that nursing students do on their hospital duty. I know it's okay to make mistakes, specially for beginners like me..but tomorrow is just very special to me. It's my first taste of the "hospital life." I'm pretty sure that's something that I'll remember for the rest of my life...just like the first day of high school, or graduation. And I want to be able to look back to my first day of duty and say to myself that I did good.

Anyway..I'm also a bit disappointed to the groupings. It always happens. I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!

What is it, you ask??

Well, I'm always "malas" when it comes to groupings. Either I belong to the lamest group, the last group, the group with the ugliest topic, the group with the most difficult topic, or the group where I'm the loner. And unfortunately, this time, I'm the loner. Again. All my friends are together in one group.

"OMG, we belong to group 3" says one of my friends.

"Yeah, isn't it cool?" says another

"Aww, I'm with group 1. And as usual, I'm the only one left out,"

"That's okay. You'll have fun there. 'M' also belongs to your group" says another

"Anyway, we're gonna have so much fun! We'll be together for one whole year"

"Yey..fun! *rolls eyes*" (that's me, of course)

(This isn't the exact conversation we had. But it's similar to this)

*sigh*
I'm always left out. What have I ever done to deserve this??

But I guess I've already recovered from that. It was last month. And I know I'm gonna learn to love my group. Well I have to. It's permanent.

Anyway, my mom's pretty excited about it. I've already worn my white duty uniform twice but she's still crazy about how I looked like a real nurse in my uniform.

..oops! Gotta end this...Duty calls. Haha. Still have to finish packing my things for tomorrow.

I hope it all goes well.

stressed-out

BS Nursing is killing me!

Specially now that duty weeks have begun. And return demos are also piling up on us.

I suddenly don't know what I'm doing anymore. Last Friday, i had to do a demo on parenteral administration a.k.a. INJECTIONS..and my partner is just the unluckiest girl for having me as her partner. I totally messed up when I did an intramuscular route on her. She screamed in agony and I thought i was about to kill her with my gauge 23 needle. I turned her into a dartboard. I thought I knew what i was doing. The night before, i stayed up until the wee hours of the morning just so I could perfect my skills in injecting medications on a tomato. What a waste. I just wish I slept more. Oh God!!

That day was such a mess! Never in my life have I done something so drastic. The thing is, I'm not used being a mediocre person. I always strive for perfection. And I know I am a good student. I had the knowledge, but I lack the skills.

God help me.

I just want to finish this semester without killing somebody.